Often, I get so focused on where I'm going that I forget to take the time to watch the scenery as I go. The danger with this is that one day, I could look up and realize that I never saw all the beautiful things that life tried to give me.
So, May was about SLOWING DOWN. May was about taking the time to "stop and smell the roses" if you will.
Here are some things that I learned:
Slowing down is healthy
Taking time for myself is a good thing
Don't let anyone tell you how much you should work
Set boundaries
Keep time open in your schedule for the things you want to be doing
Look at your habits and decide which ones are healthy and which ones aren't, then replace the ones that weren't so good
Find a hobby that you do just for fun
Take it one day at a time
Slowing down is healthy....
I never thought that I would like slowing down. I was so busy trying to get to the next thing that stopping was never an option. Being driven is a great quality, but being a workaholic is not. I always said I would never be one of those crazy people addicted to their jobs and then I did it... I became that person. So, I'm trying to change that.
Taking time for myself is healthy...
I used to feel guilty for taking care of myself because there is always something else I could be doing. However, when I look back on that thought line, it makes less and less sense. See, if you don't take time for yourself, then you can't continue to do the things that you need to do. You burn out. It took me burning out (adrenal fatigue) to actually see that.
Don't let anyone else tell you how much you should work...
This one is tough for me. I am a bit of a people pleaser. You say jump, I say how high, you say 5 feet and I jump 10 feet. I'm 100% an over achiever. Again, not a bad quality, but without a balance, this can get dangerous. Way too many people see my personality and take advantage of it if I don't stand up for myself. This is where #4 comes in.
Set boundaries...
I've gotten so much better at this. People can only take from you what you give them. So, don't put yourself in situations where people can take advantage of you. The second you start to see red flags, walk away. You don't need anything or anyone enough to stick around for the sake of loyalty while they walk all over you. Respect yourself and your time enough to set healthy boundaries. If you don't respect yourself, others won't either. I'm not saying don't be nice, but know when enough is enough and in a kind and professional way, put your foot down. They'll push back, but you have to stick to your guns.
Keep time open in your schedule for things you want to be doing...
In my mind, my priorities went like this:
- Work
- School
- Family
- Friends/Fun
One evening, I was finally catching up with a friend of mine after being late to our dinner meeting because of work. I made a comment about not having any romantic relationships in college and this friend of mine said, "You always appeared unavailable." I was a little shocked and asked them to elaborate. Turns out, people could tell the order of my priorities and it cost me relationships I could have had. So, I decided it was time to make a change. Now, I hold time in my schedule for things like friends. It's still a work in progress, but I'm much happier knowing that there is time in my schedule for the people that mean the most to me.
Look at your habits and decide which ones are healthy and which ones aren't...
This one was huge for me this month. I realized I had a lot of "leftover" habits from college that weren't very healthy.
- Eating on the go or not eating at all
- Doing Bible time in-between things and not setting aside time specifically for this
- Working constantly
- Unhealthy coping mechanisms for stress and anxiety
All of these things were just survival tactics in college, but now they're unhealthy. So, I decided while I had to take May off anyway, I might as well see if I could change some of these habits while I was at it. Turns out, I could. I take time to sit and eat each morning before work. I set aside a half hour for my Bible time and I take breaks from working to watch movies or be with people. Sometimes the old creeps back, but that's where you have to make new habits to replace the old ones.
Find a hobby that you do just for fun...
This one is hard. I'm type A. I want to do everything well. I don't do things for fun. I do things to be the best that I can be. However, it can be as simple as coloring. Sounds strange and juvenile, but it's the only thing I enjoy doing without having to be good at it. I'm still working on finding things that I can do just for the fun of it, but this is a start.
Take it one day at a time...
Some days are better than others with Adrenal Fatigue Syndrome, but I like to plan my life out three months in advance. Clearly, that's not really an option right now, so I'm trying to get better at taking it as it comes. I've gotten better than I used to be, but I'd like to continue to grow in this area.
Anyway, thanks for coming along on my retrospect thoughts on my sabbatical month. May was not the most fun, but I learned a lot. I hope June will be better. Here's to hoping brighter days are ahead.
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